My heart has been in shreds since last august. Not because of the lawsuit, but because I'm so worried about how the boys are feeling about it. I spend whole hours feeling useless about this because really, what can we do?
I feel especially worried about Jaejoong. He has been drinking so much more now that the lawsuit has started and it just tears me up. Getting drunk alone and not even being able to get home by himself? And Mastuura's latest tweet about how Jaejoong's cellphone wallpaper is all 5 of them... I can't even imagine how horrible he feels. He goes crazy and paranoid, texting them non-stop on their ten measly off days a year, so I don't know how he's surviving right now. Please, please, if I could I would get on my knees and beg SM to please let them see each other. Can't they tell how much it hurts all 5 of them? Even if they are pissed off, I'm sure they must have some degree of fondness for these boys that they raised?
Can't they tell how hollow Changmin's cheeks have gotten without his umma to feed him? Can't they tell how they don't smile as much anymore?
I really want to find Junsu and tell him its okay, to tell all three of them not to feel guilty about the whole thing(I don't know about yoosu, but poor Jaejoong is quite obviously dying from it) and that we'll wait for them no matter how long.